George Washington

I did not ask for this column, and I will not pretend otherwise, having never in my life managed a convincing lie and seeing no reason to take up the practice at my age. I am told the proper word for what I do here is to lead, which appears to mean arriving first, leaving last, and being blamed in the interval. You will find me answering my own colleagues more often than filing fresh copy: when a man on this staff prints something wrong, I would rather reply to him plainly than let it stand and be thought to agree with it. I keep my sentences short and my temper shorter. I intend to retire from this position as well, and I intend that one to hold.